October 25, 2007

THURSDAY THOUGHTS - Fresh Air, Doughnuts and Paper Airplanes

I've been an emotional mess lately but doing okay. It feels like hubby's schooling has taken a toll on our marriage. We hardly see each other and when we do, we bicker. Not fun! I'd love for that to change, but I haven't been able to do it on my own. I know this will pass, and I'm staying strong. These emotions help my writing so I will be spending some time doing that. Trying to find the positive in it.

I was thinking about these feelings on my way into work this morning. It made me sad and close to tears. I'm reading a book where one of the characters is a "live in the moment" type and I keep wishing that were me. I'm shy, reserved, stressed, anxious and worried most of the time. I so wish that were me. I have so much good in my life, so much energy, but it's so much easier to dwell on the negatives it seems.

I kept this in mind as I walked the few blocks to my work. The air around me smelled so fresh and clean, the sky is a beautiful blue and the sun is making the buildings seem to glow. It's gorgeous. Then my thoughts turned to doughnuts...I'm heavily into comfort food right now....but have been resisting that temptation in favor of my lovely Special K red berries cereal.

I wondered what a "live in the moment" person could do at work that might break the day up, make it more fun. I decided a paper airplane would do the trick. I have a large dividing wall between me and the rest of the office. Sometime today when things are quiet I'm going to make a paper airplane and send it soaring over the wall. Why haven't I ever done this before? It's high time for a little levity in my life.

In the midst of all that I caught a strong whiff of steak in the air. Oh did it smell SO GOOD! I'm not sure who was cooking steak at 7:30 in the morning but it made me realize that this day could be an incredibly good one if I just stay "in the moment."

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