June 16, 2011

THURSDAY THOUGHTS - Nobody is perfect

I had such a great weekend celebrating my niece's first birthday!  She is so cute and I've adored spoiling her!  We played ladder ball and bocce ball as well.  It was the perfect weather for a get together! 

I have been feeling good and have been working my way toward writing again.  I promise to share some of my writing soon.  I have so many emotions that just need to get out on paper.

I had a meeting with my mental health med doctor on Wednesday and I told him that I've had a week or two every month that I just seem so down and feel like crying at the drop of a hat.  I know this is due to some wacky hormones...perhaps perimenopause because my cycles have not been as predictable as they once were.  I am frustrated because I have no reason to feel this way and yet I do.  He tells me that it is part of my genetic brain chemistry and will always be there, no matter what.  I just have to be okay with some ups and downs once in awhile.  It is my analytical brain that is not okay with this...it's just not right!  I am so fortunate and loved...I have no right to feel this way.  My coping mechanisms are all working and I have treated myself to a half hour in the sunshine, an afternoon coffee or even some clothes shopping to get me through those days.  I think what frustrates me most is that I feel great most of the time and just wish it stayed like that, knowing that nothing in my life has changed to make me feel so blue.  These are many of the thoughts I'm planning on turning into future character development for one of my stories. 

The protesters are back in action at the capitol setting up tents along the outside of the capitol square that has been dubbed "Walkerville."  It is loud.  Horns blaring, drums pounding, car horns honking, people chanting.  It is enough to give me a headache, and it has seriously cut into my walking around at lunch time.  I don't want to be anywhere near all of this, especially when the crowds have gathered.  I don't have the answers, but I really do not believe the protests that have been taking place are effective ways of finding an agreeable solution no matter what your party affiliation. 

Adelita is in the coop now.  I felt so wrong the first night she was out there instead of in our garage.  I just hated that feeling of insecurity from the separation.  It is amazing how attached you can become to a chick!!  She continues to grow so much and is nearly all feathers now.  This pic here was taken a couple days before her 3rd week with us.  I love her little tweets.  :o)

Until next week...

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